

When your girlfriends intimidate the public into listening to you talk about your interests
Inspired by that one cute tiktok trend
I love gatekeeping myself. Like no, you absolutely cannot have access to me. ☺️
(via 88smrfresh)
It must be exhausting being a vampire and eating someone who gets off to it. I’d take psychic damage too if my lasagna was into vore.
me: *slaps neck* COME GET Y’ALL FUCKING JUICE
the vampire whos been avoiding my horny ass for the past 6 months:
# the comedic potential of a reversed predator-prey dynamic is funny as hell and WILDLY under-utilized
(via choke-on-glitter)
me giving relationship advice: communicate or end it
this is literally it though
(via choke-on-glitter)
Nothing gives the same kind of random ego boost like managing to finally clean up your home and making it nice. Like ooh look at me, I’m living like people do, I made myself iced tea and I am eating my snack from a real plate. I got floors and shit.
(via shitnerdsinspace)